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Oooh Matron.....
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GBE
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PostPosted: Sun May 28, 2006 5:53 pm    Post subject: Oooh Matron..... Reply with quote

((Considering the success with Oh Behave!, which, in some ways is now unnerving as children killing people and such like.

*Shudders*

Anyway - I decided to do a complete and utter opposite. Oh hell yeah. How would the ancient decreped versions of your characters fare. With poor sight and hearing. Faintly smelling of urine and old people. Arthritis, bad knees, backs and wrists.

The most important ingredient of all, nagging and slowness. Remember, your powers will be mostly weak, and unstable to say the least.

We're starting of in an old peoples home. First task, get up. Yes. That's the first task!

Then get dressed and get to the dining room quickly, before all the porridge goes stale. Look your best, you're going on a day trip later.

Oh, and the matron, is the immortal and immovable Miss Kultz (won't she ever die? Nope! Evil or Very Mad )

Anyways, I want to walking sticks, zimmerframes, and people rabiting on about the good old days!))

Domino, now aged 87 has led an interesting life. Her guns confiscated and her tonfa replaced with two walking sticks is slightly miserable. She still has her flask and imbued spirit though. Good times rolling on.

Waking up as her alarm clock threatens to give her an heart attack. She spends the next three minutes trying to sit upright. Slowly, she dangles her legs of the side of her bed, and slides into her slippers. Slowly walking to her wardrobe unaided, she opens it slowly and pulls out a nice beige (yes, she's old, beige looks good!) dress and spends eight minutes sliding it on and doing it up.

Finally, she finds a nice pair of sensible beige pairs of shoes, and takes her beige handbag to match. Grabbing her two walking sticks, she slowly makes her way to the stairs, and sits in the Stella (changed for legal reasons) stair lift - and spends the next 5 minutes going around the staicase to the ground floor.

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 15, 2006 2:15 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

((Stella Stairlifts? Hahaha! Aren't they for drunken people?))

*Addman sighed as he looked in the mirror. His once brilliant blue fur was now a grotesque grey. As he brushed it, small clumps fell out onto the floor, lining his carpet with the remnants of yesterday's grooming session. Time had not been kind to the 82 Year old, and the young EC members such as Radman, Pet, Shroud, and Neil had kicked him out, and into a nursing home.

A nurse opens his door rather slowly, but Addman is shocked by the suddeness of her entrance*

Woah there yer young whippersnapper! In my day we used to knock on people's doors!

*The nurse helps Addman into the canteen for breakfast whilst he lectures her about how things were much better when he was part of the EC, and how the young ones knew nothing of how to run an evil corporation. They'd even done away with Sharades Night and had actually succeeded in most of their evil plots! He came into the canteen and was greeted by a lukewarm breakfast on a tray, which consisted mainly of pills and oatmeal, with a liquidised cookie on the side. Feebly, he sits down at the plain table and begins to calmly eat his food*

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 15, 2006 4:28 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

((While I doubt either Fade or Harpy [or any of my chars for that matter, except maybe Kheesth] would live this long, this oughta be fun))

*Fade stared at herself in the mirror. She still insisted on wearing all blue, although her jacket had been replaced with a cardigan and her Sapphire Dagger had been locked in a cabinet on display. Her blue hair had gone quite dark grey, but her cold watery grey eyes remained as sharp and cold as ever. She slowly brushed her hair with her once strong arms, trying not pull any of it out*

*Once that was finished, Fade turned towards the door as a nurse opened it to walk in, and stared at her*

Nurse: Miss Rrennll, it's time for-

Fade: Whoa, keep your voice down, there's no need to shout.

Nurse: But I'm not-

Fade: Didn't you hear me young one?

*Fade's eyes slowly narrow at the nurse as something she said slowly makes itself known*

Fade: How'd you know my last name?

Nurse: You told me yesterday...

Fade: Didn't I say there's no need to shout? Why, in my day we used to have manners and listened to our elders!

*Fade continues to complain about the high level of noise as the nurse carefully takes her arm and leads her downstairs to the room where the others were eating breakfast. A plate of what looks to be porridge with added vitamins and minerals in it is put in front of her, as well as a glass of orange juice. Fade starts eating the porridge as her invisibility ability plays up and half her left arm fades from view*

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 15, 2006 5:26 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

At the age of 115, Ruster was by far the oldest in the 'Sunshine Home for the old'. Her powers long gone she sat in her bed in her small room, propped up on cream, creased pillows. Her ebony face was deeply wrinkled, with saliva making its slow way down her aged chin.
Her once-deft hands, hands that had talked to trees and weaved spells and magic, were clasped weakly together on top of the hospital-type beadspread.
As she slipped into a doze her mind went back to the loamy forests and glittering streams, the dancing light and the mysterious shadow and she smiled, before wondering where the memory came from and being woken by a brisk knock on the door.

"Hello princess! It's time to rise and shine! And look what came for you!"
The nurse was as brisk as always and Ruster smailed at her
"Yes, I am a princess, did I tell you what I found out about my father, now you must always call me princess...." She trailed off into scilence as she forgot what she was saying. Her eyes were fixed on the gift the Nurse was holding. "A...A..plant, you got me a plant" her eyes grew wider.

"Yes, dear! It...came...this...morning...for...you!" the nurse said slowly and contemptivley.
"Yes, yes, I'm not completely senile, you know"
The nurse was taken aback by her patient's sudden change. Usually she was quiet and forgetful, and would take anything you thew at her, doing as you said like a little lamb.
Yes...well, it's time to come downstairs Princess" the nuse said with a little more humility.

Half an hour later they were travelling down in a glass lift, Ruster in her wheelchair, a blanket and her plant on her lap in it's pot. She touched its leaves in a loving way and the plant seemed to quivver and light seemed to travel into her hand. A smile graced her old lips, today was going to be fun.

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 15, 2006 6:26 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Trace even for a norn he is 80 years old,(Hes not a nornmal norn)but now hes blind.But he sometime knows were he is going.

Nurse:Wake up Trace.And let me hold your mirror.

Trace:No this mirror is more money you get for working her.

Nurse:But you don't fight any more.

Trace:Yes I know but you are not getting it.

Trace waked out of his room and downstairs and sat down drinking juice.

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 15, 2006 3:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

((Whiteoak is semi-immortal, but we will just suspend "reality" for the fun of this RPG and pretend that he is really, really old)) ((I'm probably the only one of you folks with actual first hand experience here due to my frequent disabilities Smile I knew it would come in handy someday.))

Whiteoak had not slept well the previous night, about the time he fell alseep, Big Nurse had come into his room and turned on the light, to see if he was asleep yet. After she left, Whiteoak was wide awake again, remebering the good old days before Obed had found that sleek young (67years old) feline and run off with her and most of the money they had secretly stashed for their old age. Memories, Regrets, old grudges, remembering how he had singled handedly destroyed the entire Phoenix group while the others had simply watched helplessly as all the worlds nodes were disappearing....

Drifting off to sleep again, when one of the orderlies came in to draw a blood sample to see if his medication levels were correct.

Cable TV had nothing on worth watching....

about to driftoff to sleep again, a lady janitor came in with a mop and bucket to mop the floor

Whiteoak asked, "Can't you do that in the daytime? I'm trying to sleep."

She replied, "but then the floor will be wet and you might slip and fall, so we do it at night so it will dry before you get up."

So he gave up and got ready for the morning. He swung his dead legs out of bed and transfered into his modified electric wheelchair. Went over to the sink and washed up, then sat by the window stareing at traffic going by until it was time to go to breakfast.

He passed the nursing station on the way and requested his pain meds, then distracted the nurse by asking him to check the Physical Therapy schedule for his appointments, when she wasn't looking, he used his magic to telekenetically lift about a dozen more opiates and flew them into his pockets. As the meds kicked in he was feeling better about life.

On the way to breakfast he passed Big Nurse and Mr Excrementus who were talking in the hallway. Whiteoak tried not be be worth noticing by them as he took a seat at the table and awaited his imitaion scrambled eggs and dry wheat toast and soy meat sausages.

Mr. Excrementus had been a fully certified doctor and KGB intell torturer back in Russia, but since emmigrating to this country his credentials were not recognized and he had to start that process all over again. At this point he was working as Physical Therapist at the nursing home.

Big Nurse came over to the tables. She handed old Addman something she said was a multivitamin, (when in fact it was a strong laxative.) She switched Trace's orange juice for someone elses tomato juice and leans over to Fade and says:

"HOW ARE YOU THIS MORNING MY DEAR SWEET THING?"

She motions to Mr. Excrementus and says:
"She doesn't hear too well.

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Shine on you crazy diamond!
And we’ll bask in the shadows of yesterday’s triumphs,
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PostPosted: Thu Jun 15, 2006 4:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

AHHHHHH!

*Fade screams, clapping her hands over her ears as they too disappeared. She had a surprisingly high pitched voice when screaming for an 89 year old*

There's no need to shout!

*She says indignantly, before grumbling about how she got the quietest part in the Cave in the EC and that silence was golden. Fade pushes her half eaten food away from her before declaring*

I'm not eating anything until you all stop shouting. I've lost my appetite

*Almost on cue, the invisibilty that had consumed her arm consumed the rest of her without her consent*

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 15, 2006 5:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Domino, having finally reached the dining room, sits down opposite Fade. Their experiences had been similar, so they seemed to have slightly bonded.

As Fade without warning completely disappeared, Domino hiccups, and a copy of her falls to the ground behind her, who mumbles something about something. Domino points at the poridge, "Caaaan I eaat that dear?"

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 15, 2006 7:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Trace knew who yelled and fallowed the noise and sat near fade and wispered some thing to fade "Hi fade" but 2 feet away from fade
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 16, 2006 3:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

As Ruster was wheeled into the breakfast room she spied several of her EC collegues and other people she had seen about the Home. Most of them didn't even know her name and stared at her as she came in waving regally from her chair.
She spied Addman sitting alone and motioned the nurse to wheel her over there quickly. She held a secret flame for the puppet, and had done since she first came to the Cave. Besides, she'd always liked hairy men.

"Hello Addman dear, dont you think it's a little quiet around here?" She said slyly. "I think its time we made things a bit more exiting dont you?"

She scanned the room, her nurse had gotten side tracked in getting her food and was chatting flitatiously with the orderly, and Big nurse and Dr. Exrecmentus were talking seriously while pointing at several of the patients calmly eating their food on the other side of the room. The Matron was thankfully nowhere to be seen.

The she spied a large plastic potted spider plant near the doorway and her eyes slid back to the nurse and doctor who were standing only a few feet away from it. She grinned.

Glancing down at the plant on her lap she dug her fingers into it's soil and pointed a shaking hand at the plastic plant. Silently a flash of green light zipped across the room, hitting the pot squarely and squidging through the plastic to get to the fake plant.

The Big nurse looked round suspiciously but saw nothing to worry her before returning to her task. Slowly the green sbstance appeared to be creepig up the plastic plant and giving it life, the leaves shivered as though in a breeze and soon the whole plant was lit up with a green glow.
When the Glow faded the plant was left looking the same as before and Ruster turned to Addman and gave him a hefty wink.
"Check this out" she said. Turning again to the plant she whispered something and the plant seemed to nod before slowly and silently reaching out its tendrils towards the two officials. Then in a sudden movement the plant grabbed the hem of the Nurse's uniform and pulled it up over her head, and in the same motion, grabbed the Doctors trousers and with a sudden yank, pulled them downwards to reveal a large and voluminous pair of polkadot y-fronts.

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 16, 2006 6:17 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

((Lol, funny stuff Ruster))

*Addman watches, slightly bemused by Ruster's interaction. If he didn't know better, he could have sworn that his evil colleague had suddenly become quite flirtatious in her old age. Still, he couldn't help but chuckle as she humiliated the nursing staff with relative ease.*

Ruster, you've still got the spirit. This reminds me of the good old days when we used to douse Net's clothing in flesh eating earwigs, and the time we warped everyone into Hades and had a party whilst they were gone. Those were good times...

*Addman's face sunk as he began to come back to reality. Reminising always made him feel glad, but when he stopped remembering, the grimness of his current existence always depressed him. He sighed into his oatmeal and took a spoonful. Flavourless and dry, he nearly dribbled it back out in quiet disgust*

...I guess we can't keep up with the young un's now though.

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You other muppets can't deny,
When a girl walks in with a biscuit tin,
And a cookie in your face you get...hungry!

I has me a blog
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 16, 2006 6:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

((Flesh-eating earwigs?! So that's what happened to my liver. And all this time I thought you'd stolen it...))

*Net walks in and plops himself beside Addman and Raven. He'd always held a sort of fatherly love for them, even though they were both at least a full twenty years older than him.*

I wouldn't say that ole' chap. I bet we could easily overpower these two wanna-be gods and go pay the cave a visit. Like the olden days, eh? Those young 'uns wouldn't know what hit 'em Wink.

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 16, 2006 1:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ruster's eyes sparkled at the thought, she gasped.
"I, have a plan!" She said, while raising a shaky finger in the air. She leaned in conspiriatorally.
"Here, listen, when we go on this day trip, I prpose a little mischeif...*whisper whisper*"

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 17, 2006 12:55 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

ravil was being stubborn in the dining hall.her black colouring had faded to grey,and she wore various shades of grey as she felt that this was now her morphian colour.She looked about 65,and was standing on the ceiling in her 8 legged mode with her arms folded as her son ananci tried to convince her to come down.His morpian colour was black,and his EC cowl fitted the colour nicely.
he wasn't getting anywhere asking he to come down.He half morphed so he had his dragon wings and leaped up to bring her down of the ceiling.He was now learning the hard way that she was still quite fast in her old age.she rushed off the ceiling onto the floor next to a abandoned table,waiting for somebody to notiss she wanted her breakfast.
ananci sighed and glided to the floor in time to see some of the EC elders.Smiling broadly,he wrote something down on a piece of paper her was carrieing with him and handed it to them before he went to sort out him mother.
the note said "we could still use some ideas from you guys in the EC.we're running out of ideas because of the fact that we can be so efficant at being Evil.Pleasure to see some of you:all three of you are famous in the cave."

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 17, 2006 5:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

...
...
...

Net: Well, if you take us to the park (At this point, Net winks at Ruster and Addman) we'll... Uhh... 'Let on' some of our lesser-known secrets. Like what not to do if you turn into a two year old toddler, where to find large quantities of bad pickup lines and how to permanently scar small children with bad innuendo. Boy, is that one fun to play on rainy nights Wink.

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