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Posted: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:52 am Post subject: BlackSouls Character |
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Name: Monto
Age: 46
Gender: Male
Species: Wizard
Supernatural Abilities: Controls lightning
Weaponry: A staff
Equipment: A robe
Home: None he's a nomad
Alignment: On the good side
Known Weaknesses: That is classified
Allies: None just himself
I do think that is it |
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LordPsycho Black Tiger (Admin)
 Blue Mantis (Admin)
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Posts: 1785
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Posted: Wed Feb 14, 2007 8:02 am Post subject: |
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two things I have issues with.
Known weaknesses: You have to understand, there is a difference between what you as an RP'er knows, and what your character knows. For example, my character is very vulnerable to the cold, but I have no problems telling others of this. The question comes down to, do those people's characters have a way of knowing. Danikat's character, for example, found out through her experience fighting my character, with some help from her armadillo spy network. Most of the EC found out from my time with the organization.
Secondly, it's encouraged that you give them more detail. let's take the staff? Is it wood, metal, ivory. Is it enchanted or otherwise magical? or is it just a rod to hit things with?
Also his home? Why is he a nomad? Did he just never attach himself to one place, or is he running from something?
Other than that it's a good start to a character. _________________
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Triona White Belt
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Posted: Wed Feb 14, 2007 2:01 pm Post subject: |
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It's a fantastic character sheet, but a few things are niggling me in the back of my head.
First off, equipment might be better said as clothing. Unless the robe has some sort of effect on your character, it's just classfied then as a piece of clothing for covering one's naughty bits. Your definition of Wizard also annoys me. Species? I'd call them a race.
Finally, to end my criticism, he could be on the good side of oatcakes for all I know from that sentence.
By the way, all of the above is in my own opinion. Good start for a character (and cudos for having someone who's aged above 40). Just like DP said, all it needs is detail which comes naturally once you start to roleplay him. _________________ http://trionadreams.deviantart.com/
Smile like you mean it. |
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Danikat Green Fox (Mod)
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Posts: 1058
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Posted: Thu Feb 15, 2007 4:41 am Post subject: |
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Personally I'd say the only part that could be a problem is putting them on "the good side". And then only because Blackstar doesn't exactly have a good side.
I suppose The Guardians might qualify, but theres so many diffrent factions and independant beings, all with their own agendas that trying to divide them into good and bad simply doesn't work.
Everything else would simply benefit from a little more detail, which will come as the character gets used in RP's. _________________ Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to decieve ~ Sir Walter Scott
"There are three kinds of people in this word: Those who make things happen, those who watch things happen and those who wonder what on earth just happened." |
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LordPsycho Black Tiger (Admin)
 Blue Mantis (Admin)
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Posted: Thu Feb 15, 2007 5:55 am Post subject: |
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You forget, he can be from LP's Ojod, and considering the world of LP is polarized into "Good" and "Evil", it would work just fine.
Or you can stay in our dimension and fight off more mutant chickens while we try to set of an unstable warp portal in a shield while the ever confused Fort fires on us....fun times... _________________
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Swix Black Chameleon Belt (Mod)
 Green Mantis (Mod)
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Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2007 3:22 am Post subject: |
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To clear up a little thing about the Guardian, they are a Neutral organisation. That's why there are all sorts of species and races in there that otherwise wouldn't work together. There are Good (my own), Neutral (I think Kiba and Lep class themselves as this) and Evil (Shadowveil) aligned characters all mixed up in this.
Also, a brief history might be a good idea for this character? You could use that to tell us why he's a nomad, if he has family etc.
As for known weaknesses, I don't think you actually have to put them. Personally I don't put those in my profiles, you have to find or figure it out for yourself. Some ar obvious and some aren't.
What colour is your robe or staff? What does your character actually look like? I don't see much description here, but with it being your first try it's not all that bad. _________________ Baker of the radioactive three-eyed flying purple cookie eating brownies!
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