Welcome to the Inconvenience Store (a relatively random RP)

[3kul]

((Ok, given the relatively low amount of posting in recent times, I've decided to throw in a pretty simple RP thread. The premise? For some reason, you've entered the Inconvenience Store - the shop run by Little Sister and HollowEyes on the edge of the Black Forest. That's it. Don't ask me why you wandered in there, maybe you needed a bottle of milk or something (for the sake of this RP, I'm going to make it similar to a regular convenience store and not just sell charms), or maybe you just wanted to destroy the multiverse starting with this store. Totally up to you as to why you're there, and totally up to you as to what you do once you're there.

Basically it's a no commitment, no definate story kind of RP. I figure this way, people won't be so worried about having to 'pause' it or anything because there'll be no need to worry about missing all that much. Going on holiday? Just leave the store, it's not that hard. Missed out on what's going on? Ask someone in character, maybe they'll tell you (or maybe they'll be a huge jerk and not tell you, who knows). This thing's either going to really suck and die away quickly or it'll pick up and might become a half-decent thread, I don't really mind either way. Enough jabber from me though, RP away! ))

The Inconvenience Store, aptly named given it's location, had been going through some tough times. There tended to be more wolves hanging around than customers nowadays, and with those numbers the few customers they did have usually never made it to the door. ~There goes another one...~ Little Sister commented as the pair heard snarling and screaming from outside. After the racket died down she wandered out the door to go and see if the wolves had left the customer's wallet behind.

HollowEyes went about making sure that things were all in order whilst she was gone. They'd just recently taken to stocking everyday items in hopes of getting more customers that way, as charms didn't quite seem to pull in the customers as they once had. In addition to that, HollowEyes had cleared a corner of the store to have as a small diner kind of area, with a few tables and chairs set up, although they'd learnt the hard way that they didn't really have the staff or money for that kind of thing. They had tried doing it all themselves, but the customers who did eat their cooking had a nasty habit of either spontaneously combusting or melting, both of which made it quite hard for the customer to pay their bill.

~Nothing really that interesting on what was left of him.~ Little Sister said in a somewhat bored tone, wandering back inside and sitting back up at the counter. Before HollowEyes could ask her why she hadn't gone ballistic and killed the wolves like she usually did, a rather odd sound interrupted them. The loud creaking of the automatic door as somebody entered wasn't that unusual a sound, but it was when they weren't responsible for opening it. It could only mean one thing - a customer had entered the Inconvenience Store.

((There we go. Like I said, no real story, unless you want to try and go with one (there's a few opportunities there that I've listed). Enjoy. ))

[Netdroid9]

*Through the door stepped a rather dramatic looking figure of binary. After scanning the room, he promptly scratched his ass and walked up to the store's owner.*

Net: Got any charms for getting rid of angry mobs?

*In the very instant that Net finished his sentence, a rather less dramatic figure ran in, very barely missing the door. He quickly smashed the door's control panel, sealing the two spirits from the angry mob outside.*

Net2: ...Why can't you just give Sauron his ring back?!
Net: I told you, I pawned it.
Net2: Why the hell would you pawn the one ring?!?!
Net: They had a special on-
Net2: ...Don't finish that sentence, I can guess the rest.
Net: What's wrong with-
Net2: Think of the children!
Net: I hate children. They smell funny.
Net2: That's because they smell like you.
Net: HEY! *Sniff.* Oops, sorry, my mistake. Do you sell deodorizer too?

[Swix]

*A large, silvery looking wolf padded over to the wolves currently hanging around the Inconvenience Store. This particular wolf was about 3 foot high from paw to shoulder, well built and apparently well fed. Not only that, but this one was a female*

*As it walked over the small pack, the apparent leader of the mangy canines, the alpha turned to snarl at her. It hadn't picked this spot to be usurped by a lone wolf, no matter how big or powerful it was. Hackles raised, tail stock still, ears flat on it's and with bared teeth it approached the loner*

*The werewolf mimicked the alphas movements, it had been a while since she'd been leader of a pack and if some upstart mangy mutt wanted a demonstration of why he shouldn't mess with her he was welcome to it*

*They approach and circle each other, waiting for the pounce*

[Cloud]

*A figure smashed through the front door battling two wolves. The fight was over in a matter of seconds and the victor stood up, picked up the wolf carcasses and dragged them to the counter.*

How much would you offer for these?

[Somefreakoverthere]

A second figure came charging though the doorway,and skidded to a halt.

"want us to fix that for you?"

Alexis asked,her arm pointing at the giant door.

It was then the both looked at the wolf that had bitten it,and pulled it into range of her head.In seconds she and banshee headbutted it on the kidneys,and pulled it off and tossed it outside.

"It's going to be Deaf for a week.Anyway,like Alexis said,want us to fix the door for you?"

Banshee asked cheerfuly.They were,by Blackstar standards,rather freaky,and the two where fairly proud of that.

[addman]

((Let's go a little off cannon here from the usual ranks and stuff of the EC. I've got an idea for my entrance to this RP, let me know 3kul if this is unacceptable and I'll think of another way to write myself in.))

*Addman pops his head out of the stock room*

Hey Holloweyes! We're running low on exploding milk!

*The muppet had recently accepted a job working part time at the Inconvenience Store. He was desperate for the money as his cookie obsession was reaching new heights. He lived in a crate out back as he had sold his apartment, and most of his possessions to fund his crazed habit.

Addman was still a relative newbie at the store, and was still under supervision from HE and LS. He was prone to odd newbie error, but all in all, the work wasn't too hard and he had picked up most of what he needed to know to do his job*

We're also out of baby panda meat.

*The puppet takes a look around and realises that the store finally has customers. Albeit, noisy and messy customers. He approached the first one and responded to his query*

For getting rid of angry mobs? How would a plague of locusts suit your needs sir?

[3kul]

((That's cool Addman, like I said, I don't mind what people do - that's what'll make things interesting (hopefully ). Btw, those wolves are APCs, anyone can control them. Feel free to add APC customers as well if you want, though the store's pretty crowded atm ))

~Cloud, those wolves cost money, and so did the door.~ Little Sister quickly punched a few buttons on the cash register. It was a stupid machine that she absolutely loathed. Each number was actually a letter, and the receipt generally printed out a phrase instead of a numerical amount. Neither HollowEyes nor Little Sister realized that it was actually a typewrighter.

HollowEyes was glad that Addman had taken care of Net, the new store clerk showed promise (about as much promise as one can show in that line of work). The only downside of employing him was that they had to stop selling any variety of cookies, and instead sold biscuits, scones and other similar yet differently named baked goods. HollowEyes went back to check on their stock, making note of the items that Addman had mentioned. He filled the empty crate of panda meat with penguin meat, hoping that nobody would notice the difference until they restocked.

Little Sister noticed Alexis and Banshee. ~Headbutting our wolves isn't free, neither is fixing our doors.~ She handed Cloud his receipt, which read "porcelain leprosy" and began typing out another one for the latest pair of freaks to stumble on in.

[LordPsycho]

*DP popped in to pay his Royalty dues for being able to sell his charms. Except, to make a show of protest, he made a loud audable pop that broke the few remaining windows*

Well Holloweyes, looks like you actually have customers now. Anyways, here's your money, can I have my license to sell Charms for this month?

[Somefreakoverthere]

"sorry,we may be part shee but we're not telepaths."

Banshee said,both watching the machine carefuly.

"And thats a typewriter thing,i think..."

Alexis added.

"Cut off my head,banshee.It might help us out of here."

She hissed to him as Emily slunk back in,human and clothed.
_____________________________
"I'm not one of your wolves."

She snapped as she ajusted her belt.Male werewolfs were lucky - they only needed to worry about a pair of shorts.Females had a harder time,and the diskworld werewolfsHad it really bad.

[Cloud]

Porcelain leprosy? Oh wait I think I have one of those.

*Cloud sifted through his cloak very suspiciously and pulled out a porcelain leprechaun. He placed it on the counter and looked at Little Sister.*

Close enough? I really need to learn mind speech.

[addman]

Addman: Hey, get that off the counter! Leprichaun's are very offensive to my people!

Random Customer: Leprichaun's are offensive to puppets?

Addman: Yes

Random Customer: May I ask why?

Addman: Their happy-go-lucky charm distracts attention from us, hence the great puppet-leprichaun war in 1994.

RC: Really, who won?

Addman: Have you seen a leprichaun lately?

RC: Come to mention it, I used to bump into tons of Lepricauns prior to 1994. They used to steal my cheese and pegs and all sorts.

Addman: See this scar? Got it from a leprichaun knife fight in the middle of a mine field.

Porcelin Leprichaun: No you didn't, you bloody liar! You tripped and fell whilst trying to escape from the conflict!

Addman: GASP! You're alive!

Porcelin Leprichaun: That's right! And I'm here to kill you! You tripped on the barrel release button of a porcelin mixer whilst trying to scarper, which released it's load onto me! Now I am trapped in porcelin forever! But never mind, I shall soon have my revenge! MWAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!

*Addman picks up a large novelty mallet off of a nearby shelf and smashes the Porcelin leprichaun. He then walks up to the tannoy system*

Addman: Clean up in aisle one.

[Embri]

Gliding on balky thermals, Embri cursed and swerved, dodging yet another infernal creature. This one has several avian heads, and far too many teeth for her liking. It pursued, with a rasping cry, so Embri doused it with a shot of Flamethrower.

The crispy carcass fell to the ground, accompanied by the stench of singed feathers and putrid meat.

I don't get paid enough for this! Embri scanned the ground below. She had several rush deliveries scheduled for some place called the Inconvenience Store... What an apt name. It's most inconvenient to find.

Finally, the winged unicorn spotted a likely looking building... if you could call it that. More like a run down shack. Well, a delivery is a delivery... and I always deliver.

Swooping down, she noted with interest some kind of lupine contest going on a short distance from the store, involving several wolves and what looked like the familiar shape of a fellow EC member. Landing amongst the scrub bushes, Embri trotted purposefully towards the door, shoving it open and taking a look inside. Well well. a lot more crowded in here than I would have thought.

Embri eyed the assortment of beings populating the small store, before turning her attention to finding someone to sign for her deliveries. She turned towards the counter, and curled her lip. Of all people... it had to be Little Sister. Wrinkling her nose in distaste, Embri walked up to the counter and addressed the Parasitian.

~Hey, I've got a couple of deliveries addressed to the Inconvenience Store. You going to sign for them?~ Embri sent, pulling a clipboard from her satchel. She read the manifest.

~Looks like mostly perishables. Baby panda meat, parchment paper, three crates of assorted tentacles, and something called....Mulapoco. Whatever that is.~

With a sigh, Embri looked at Little Sister, wondering if she was going to have a hard time with her.

[Panther385]

((Yay! Something to occupy my time! x3 ))

Panther kicked the random wolves aside, spouting random curses in japanese. The shape-shifter walked up to the store and entered. Not to shabby, She mused. Cpuld use work on the outside, though. The store was a tad more crowded than she thought it would be. She swiftly escorted herself to the back of the store and began looking around.

[Swix]

*The werewolf had just about had enough of waiting and was ready to pounce, when someone else barrelled past, causing the alpha and another to leap upon them. Disappointed that the stranger (aka Cloud) had killed them both so quick, and the small pack of wolves had just shrunk by two Tala padded towards the shop*

*She picked up several scents, some weren't all that pleasant but one intrigued her. Of all things, another werewolf, in this place?*

*As Tala approached the now sorry looking store, she changed back to her human form, her clothes reappearing from the fur under which they'd previously been hidden*

[3kul]

((Wondering if she was going to have a hard time with LS? Embri, you should know by now that that's a given .))

~Windows don't grow on trees, DP.~ Little Sister handed Banshee and Alexis their receipt (which read [brick of fangs]) and began sorting out a new one for DP. "What's a typewriter?" HollowEyes asked, before turning to DP. He checked the God's money to make sure it was all there, then nodded. "Looks like everything's in order, so yes, that should be fine. Please try not to be so clumsy with your entrance next time though DP, I'm sure the customers don't appreciate being showered with glass."

Little Sister watched Cloud's strange form of payment, followed by Addman's quick and not-very-climactic fight with the porcelain leprochaun. She shoved a broom into Addman's hands as she handed DP his receipt (which read [gravy focus]), reminding the blue trainee of his place.

Suddenly, much to Little Sister's amusement, Embri arrived with their latest delivery. ~Well, well, well. Looks like everybody's little pack mule has arrived at last, a full minute and 23 seconds late! And I don't recall ever allowing animals into my store.~ She picked up the clipboard and dipped a tendril of hair into the mop bucket next to her, which was filled with something black and sticky instead of water. ~Brainless beasts of burden like yourself would never understand the art and delicacy that is Mulapoco, but I doubt your brain capacity can handle that much anyway.~ Signing the clipboard with the vile liquid, Little Sister passed it back to Embri. ~So on a scale of one to ten, just how vulnerable and defenseless is that brat of yours right now?~

HollowEyes cocked his head to one side as he watch Panther boldly enter the store and head straight for the adult magazine section of the store (they'd tried to cater for many tastes, but it was usually easier to stock the ones that put Net into a fit of giggidys). Little Sister was equally surprised, though was too busy taunting Embri to really care. Shrugging it off as something not to worry too much about, he quickly made his way out to the back to take care of the stock Embri had dropped off. As he sifted through the assorted meats and tentacles, he wondered if perhaps they did need more help around the Inconvenience Store. Today they'd been swamped with customers, so more employees might help. Or at least a working cash register. He made a mental note to stick up a 'help wanted' sign later.