Keep Cornielius ALIVE!

[addman]

Basically, the first poster sets up Cornelius for what looks like a certain death. The second poster then either intervenes, or makes up a set of events which stops Cornelius from dying, then sets up their own problem. For example:

[LordPsycho]

Fortunately for Ole' Cornie, enough bodies from both sides reached him before collapsing on him and forming a protective coccoon. Only problem was, he couldn't breath because they were crushing him.

[addman]

Luckily, the soldiers all carried oxygen masks, so Cornie managed to use these for the next few weeks to survive. He also steals their water canisters and chews their bodies for sustenance.

After a certain amount of time, the bodies begin to decompose, and as such, a new deadly disease is formed within their festering corpses. This virus will turn a person inside out and make their brain explode at the same time. The contagious disease floats through the air towards Cornelius' mouth.

[LordPsycho]

Fortunately for Cornie, at that point he realized that they have become light enough for him to force them off of him.

Unfortunately, he decided to wear his german uniform, circa WWII, to the picnic, and busted out right as a patrol from the Allies passes by (which nationality I'll leave to the next poster.)

[GBE]

As the troop of Americans take aim at the German clothed Cornelius, just about pull the trigger, a German bomber plane flies over head, releasing a barrage of bombs, this makes the Americans look up, now hoever, Cornie is about to die a rather explosive death...

[Netdroid9]

...When suddenly the bombs explode for no apparent reason. Why? Some idiot messed up with the wireing (Net: Hey!). The shrapnel from the blast is still deadly, however, and shreds the allies to pieces, leaving Cornelius unharmed. As he finishes his picnic, unbeknowest to him, an evil genetically engineered mutant psychotopia parasite that he caught from the Nazi's he'd been chewing on earlier desides to eat his brainzzzzzzz...

[addman]

But, by some weird coincidence, the parasite actually caught the inside-out virus which almost affected Cornelius earlier. It promptly turned itself inside out and died.

Cornelius finished his picnic, and decided to set up the colourful parasol he bought with him so he could rest in the shade. He plunges the giant umbrella into the ground, straight towards a hidden landmine.

[Ashen Rain]

Thankfully however, the parasol is made out of an extremly tough alloy, and it has a kind of rusty hinge holding it open. The Hinge breaks, and the parasol snaps shut around him, covering his entire body (including his corny Cornie feet) so that, when the land mine goes off, he is perfectly safe and unharmed.

The problem is, that this tough alloy heats up fairly quickly, and... well, lets just say that it's on fire and the like. Not to mention the broken, sharp ended rusty hinge that Cornie is precariously close too right now. Tetnis shots anyone?

[Miyanokouji]

Fortunately for Cornie, the German armour he is wearing is flameproof, and the hinge eventually melts, opening the parasol.

Cornie surverys the scene, there's a mountain, and a beach. Somehow he manages to get through the minefield and onto the beach for a swim and sunbathe. He doesn't notice the English snipers on top of the mountain, pointing their rifles directly at his back.

[Raven]

Just as the snipers shoot, something caught Cornies foot and dragged him down. The bullets skimmed the water and missed. Unfortunatly the thing that pulled him down was a shark.

[Ashen Rain]

Thankfully for cornie however, he took his german suite off to swim around, and when the English look through their binoculars to find the naked horror of Cornie's Corny butt, they drop their rifles and scatter to the four winds to commence vomiting.

Unfortunately, while Cornie is out in the water, a great white man eating shark, somewhat like Jaws, swims in Cornies direction after coming three hundred thousand miles from it's native habitat, without eating a thing.

[addman]

((Thats odd how you both had the same idea at the same time))

Cornie, remembering his Discovery Channel Survival Training, knew that sharks could be warded off by simply punching them on the nose. A quick bop on the nose only serves to anger the shark further, thus breaking it's New Year's Resolution to turn the other cheek. The shark begins to cry and heads off to eat a whole tub of Ben And Jerry's by itself.

Although saved from the shark which had dragged him underwater, Cornelius begins to run out of oxygen fast!

[GBE]

Fortunately for Cornie, a man had recently been eaten by the shark, and somehow, his scuba suit had been left behind. Cornie managing to scramble to it quickly, straps it on and attaches the mouth piece to himself....

The only problem now is, because he did it under water, at such a depth, the presure is going to make his lungs explode, horrifically....

[addman]

As he sinks into the dark abyss, his chest begins to feel heavy and he becomes unable to do anything as the pressure become insummountable.

Below him, an underwater volcano erupts, sending up a warm jet stream underneath Cornelius, pushing him at high velocity towards the surface. He emerges from the water with a massive splash, and soars through the air. Unfortunately, one of the German fighter planes flying low, is on a direct collision course with Cornie.

[Cirrial]

Fortunately for Cornelius, though, the plane is shot down by a nearby Allied fighter plane and explodes in the air, narrowly missing him.

Unfortunately, however, there is now the force of the explosion and plenty of jagged shrapnel hurtling towards Cornie...